I CU

I CUWe have a new weekly meme up at the Christian Unschooling site called I CU.  The following are the statements/questions for everyone to fill in (or if you are feeling really inspired share a photo for each:)):


This week we want to…
honestly I don’t know.  My brain is so tired from trying to get the CU site in order, update the theme, get the groups on Facebook organized (and combined) and just keeping up with everything plus the GAPS diet (which is going fine but which I really need to come up with some meals for) and all the other stuff, well, the kids have been really doing their own thing because I have been busy.  Right now most of the stuff that is happening is external.  My grandmother just moved to an assisted living place not far from us which means I am spending a lot of time running errands for her and visiting (we have always gone once a week because she lived half an hour away now she is only 10 minutes away.)  That combined with the new Facebook groups, several sites I am working on for clients, the CU site, and taking care of the house and food stuff (all learning curves) and I am brain dead.  (Shamus is writing his book again, which is AWESOME but it means I have less help as he needs to focus when writing.

The kids are working on different projects.  Rachel and Esther are working on essays for a contest over at Gaming Angels to win a scholarship to National Computer Camp— both of them desperately want to win.  Rachel has spent the last couple days working on it and we are all pretty excited to see how far she has come with her writing– she actually had 900 words and needs to get it down to 500-600.  Oooo, and Issac has found a series of books he LOVES and is willing to help me read (he reads the first page of the chapter, I read the rest).  It is really adorable (though there have been a few things that I skip– like using God as a swear word.  Sigh.)  But the really awesome thing is not only is he asking me to read aloud to him nightly but he is finally asking for “just one more chapter” which my little engineer never does.  So that is pretty exciting.

I am learning Hebrew, how out of website ideas I am (working on the CU site and my brain is dead), a new technique for sketching out my paintings.  I am also learning how to get regular meals going for the GAPS diet because I keep forgetting due to all the other work I am doing.

I am struggling with change, people, and fears.  In general I like change but sometimes it makes me uncomfortable:

For instance, right now we are dealing with the very real possibility of losing our house but we don’t know and maybe God will step in and provide yet again (as He has throughout this whole time we have been living off what He provides– and He HAS provided, everything but the mortgage.)  And it is really the potential change combined with fear and not knowing that is getting to me.  So, I need to be leaning on Him here instead of trying to solve the problem on my own (which almost never works.)

Sometimes change makes me disappointed:

Like today when I realized my husband was, after a frustrating day of not getting work on his book done due to interruptions, up all night writing which means a new change of rhythm for the household.  Every month or so we have to adjust to a new rhythm and we had just gotten comfortable in this one and had hoped it would last. So I am sad knowing the kids are disappointed (less time with Daddy when he is working all night and sleeping all day) and that their sleep is going to shift so they can get more time with him, not to mention it will ruin potentially plans already made, especially if it shifts anymore (unlike most he finds it impossible to stay up for something and be coherent unless his body is doing the shifting– so more fear as I realize he might miss Rachel’s piano recital after all– which will devastate her.  SO, changing subject before I think of more fears…..

People.  I am currently angry at several people (and not liking them very much) because I feel they have been unreasonable, which makes me want to avoid them.  I am praying about this because first, these people do tend to suck the life out of me and even when we are on good terms I come away drained.  

This week is the first time…. Rachel has written something long and been willing to really go back and edit multiple times so she can get it right.  I am so proud of her.  Keeping in mind that she is severely dyslexic and this is the first time she has willingly submitted to editing and has done multiple drafts.  In fact she was up early , all excited because she wanted her daddy to help her edit.

So, having written all this I realize just how overwhelmed I am and I hadn’t even realized it.  And no wonder, really.  On the other hand, I need to hand all the worries over to God (really) and STOP IT.  Just STOP IT.

Now, its your turn. And when you do I CU on your blog, link up so we can all be in it together.